Motherhood- The Hardest Job in the world. You do the work of 20 for free. You deserve self-care. It's not selfish, It is necessary.
This Mother's Day, I would like to pay tribute to all of the mamas out there who need to reclaim a little "me" time. Mom’s around the world love Mother’s day because it is the one day that they get breakfast in bed, a spa day, and cards of gratitude. Every other day Mom’s do the work of 20, all for free, and often they go unrecognized! There should not just be one day when we celebrate the superheroes of our worlds. We need to celebrate moms every day! Without mothers, the world would never function the way it does now.
I recently lost my mother this past year. To get through this first Mother’s Day without my mom, I need to focus on the job she gave me the capability to do.
I am a mom, and I had had the privilege to raise my two youngest children from birth, my stepdaughter at age 8 when she relocated to our home, and love and encourage my oldest stepson as he grew into adulthood. If I had to describe, what is it like to be a mom, it means that you are doing a job that requires your mind to have a continuing concern about the wellbeing of your children.
If you ask someone, what they think may be the hardest job ever, many will say a Doctor. I can understand this response, and I would agree, YES.
I can speak from firsthand experience when I say YES. My husband is a brain surgeon, and I see every day how hard he works. He has sleepless nights, patients and family members crying, nights full of distress, days, if not weeks without seeing his family. As a doctor, he has the responsibility of human life in his hands. If he makes one mistake, his patient may die. One error and someone’s mother, father, child or, loved one may be gone. Sounds a bit surreal, but it isn't at all, it is the reality faced for the job of a doctor. That's why when doctors say you must love this career, they aren't kidding. You must have a heart for taking care of people to continue the job of a doctor. But I know another job, that may even be more difficult, the job of being a mother.
A mother goes through a lot of what a doctor does, the sleepless nights, children crying, the nights full of the distress, and even more. They aren’t just in charge of one organ of their child; they oversee everything. The health, the wellbeing, the education, the values and morals, the respect the child has for others and so much more. One error, one misstep, and the child can go down a painful path. They can choose the route of drugs, drinking, or lose their ambition or goals. My husband had the training to be an excellent surgeon; he had specific training to take out a brain tumor, to implant electrodes deep into the brain to help Parkinson's disease. He has continuing education requirements to keep his job. Moms and stepmoms do not have a manual to be a good mother; there is only love and “motherly instinct” as many mothers call it.
On top of that, they weigh with them their entire life the errors of their decisions with this child, but also the successes. Being a mother isn’t easy; it’s the hardest job in the world that comes with no instructions or manual what so ever. A mom feels ecstatic when their children are happy or when they succeed, and they feel pain and disappointment when things do not go for their children as they had hoped. When they are sick, we wish it was us, and when they hurt, we want to take it all away, because the love of a mother is so deep. As I have had disappointments with my children and stepchildren, I have cried and cried, unfortunately too many times to count. I am happy to say my mother created an independent, loving woman who was ready to take on the job of mothering her children and stepchildren.
So, to my mother, thank you and to all the great mothers out there, thank you for taking such a task, you deserve a high five and pat on the back today and every day.
You hear this all the time, but you genuinely cannot take care of other people if you’re not taking care of yourself. Find what works for you and stick with it, no matter what the time or financial sacrifice may be. Your health and happiness are so important to you and your family. Take time for self-care which will result in self-love. It's not selfish, it's necessary, and you will be a happier mother, person, friend for it.
Happy Mother’s Day!